Fests and Family

The good thing about living here is that all Wisconsinites appreciate that summer weekends are finite, and everyone is ready to pack in as much activity as possible. This July and August have been no exception with all the typical fun weekend mayhem.

In July we made our annual pilgrimage to the Summer Fest grounds to check out Festa Italiana with the Bansemars. The weather was ungodly hot but by the time we rolled in the Lake Michigan breeze was kicking in and made it tolerable for toddlers and pregos alike. The festivals for which MKE is famous are all basically the same: food, beer, fun for the kiddies, fireworks. But no other is like walking into a scene from Jersey Shore, and no other features an actual Maio in their historical tent:

Seated front and center in the barber chair: Karl's father, John Maio. I am not even making this up.

Matt's mission was to try as many rice balls as were available to purchase. For those who aren't in the know (read: me until about 8 years ago), a rice ball is indeed a ball of rice, sometimes with some cheese in the middle, sometimes if you're feeling wild it might have some peas and ground beef mixed then, then fried with a little marinara on top. I don't really see how it's different from condensing any normal meal into ball-form, but let me tell you there are rice balls-a-plenty at Festa and we tried every one. Also available in mass quantities: cannoli. OBVIOUSLY. Not unlike rice balls I could really live my entire life without cannoli which suits Matt just fine because it means he doesn't have to share. Scratch that, it used to mean he didn't have to share. G is turning out to be quite the foodie and her love of savory flavors translated well to a deep fried tube of ricotta cheese. Cannoli for one? Fuggedaboutit!

Who can stuff their face faster?


She may be under four feet tall, but the girl can pack it away


Waiting patiently for their rice balls

Since the girls are a little bigger we planned to stay for the Festa Fireworks, which are well known to be "'da best". Despite Alana's attempts to flee parental supervision (that girl may be little but let me tell you, she is fast), the girls were really good and everyone loved the fireworks (Mama! They're big and go BOOM!).

We also ventured to State Fair with the Bansemars a couple weekends ago. Both G's and my first trip ever to State Fair was two years ago so we figured it was time to take the tot and teach her about people watching. We planned to go on a Saturday afternoon, which was probably the first clue that we were out of our minds. That morning I received a text from Melissa saying, "may not make it" along with a photo of sweet little Alana with a left eye so swollen you might mistake her for a prize fighter. Wee Alana has very strong reactions to mosquito bites and apparently the night before one had gotten her well enough to send her immune system to war. After a trip to the doc she acted totally unfazed and we were happy to hear back from Mel that afternoon that Alana was ready to rock the fair. Now, I will spare you the photo of Alana's eye but I cannot spare you the photo of what Matt wanted to wear:

Well, we DID live in West Allis

After carpooling down and Shawn encroaching on Matt-style road rage to find a parking spot we finally made it to the fair. The first stop Matt wanted to make was the 'milk barn' where you can buy cups of flavored milk for $0.25. There were five flavors and six of us, so obviously we got two of each kind. Genevieve downed the strawberry like it was her job.

Cheers!

Afterward we ventured to the barns. First stop: ducks and rabbits. Second stop: cows. We had a little calling system with Shawn & Mel to alert each other of super Wisco-fied specimens coming our way, and Shawn alerted us to a goodie in the cow barn. This woman had to be in her mid-40's and was walking toward us with the hem of her shirt tied through the neck-hole (like we used to do in the third grade), her belly hanging out, and some impressive too short mom-style jeans. She was walking our way and Matt and I chucked to each other but then realized that she was getting closer. And closer. Until she walked right up to me and said, "oh my god, are you PREGNANT?" We tried to reply politely "oh yes, thanks" and escape but nope, she came back with, "I am too! Twelve weeks. For the first time in thirty-five years!"

What's that now?

She continued to announce that there was another exhibit somewhere that could show you the size of your baby in utero and proceeded to open up her little bag and pull out a two inch rubber fetus. YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP, FOLKS. She was asking if we knew the sex (we lied) and where I was going to deliver (more lies). Suddenly I got the feeling this woman was plotting to steal our baby. So we tried to move on without the help of Shawn and Melissa who were moseying by and laughing so hard they were damn near in tears. Real pals, those two. We finally managed to escape by basically turning and walking away mid-sentence. Hello, we go to the fair to quietly take in the crazy people, not be stalked by the crazy people.

After that escapade we made our way into an air conditioned building (praise the lord, it was so blasted hot I cannot tell you) where we landed four icy beverages, six grilled cheese sandwiches, and two seats at an actual table (family-style seating). PS - this was also the time that Matt realized he was short changed at the milk barn. Damn milk! Although Mel had mentioned it earlier, I started to notice that people were staring at Alana with a mix of surprise/alarm/disgust which I thought was weird because any parent knows kids get into weird crap all the time. It wasn't until we were at said table that this woman actually piped up and said, "what HAPPENED to your baby????". I was shocked. Shocked, I say! Melissa handled it totally gracefully which is more than I think I could have done. This happened at least three more times while we were there.

At the WE Energies park. To quote Shawn, I would have preferred 10% of my energy bill back instead of having my kid get some cheap plastic hat. Also the site of Mel being accosted by a Fair Employee re: Alana's eye. A FAIR EMPLOYEE!

So to summarize, here's what we learned at the fair:

• if your child appears injured in a manner which can in any way be translated to neglect, be prepared for a lot of super special commentary from people who are probably *not* up for parent of the year
  
• if you or someone in your group is visibly pregnant, be prepared for a lot of super special commentary from a crazy person and/or baby thief
  
• if you are in a cast of any kind, the best place to go on a 90 degree, 90% humidity day is to the fair (seriously, at least 10% of the people we saw were in casts)
• only pay in small bills at the milk barn

Anyhoodle, flanking these magical Milwaukee adventures was a weekend at the cottage with both sets of grandparents. The weather was hot and perfect for swimming, and G demonstrated that she can basically swim on her own now. I would wander in with her until I was about chest-deep, then have her turn around and swim back to shore on her own. She nailed it!! Interestingly this is the same way Ralphie learned to swim, so I think the Maio family swimming method has been established. We spent the whole weekend hanging in the water, on the boat, eating, or all three. Auntie Mare came in from MSP on Saturday night and brought G her a bunch of her daughter's old dolls and books which G was super excited for.

Mastering the art of the noodle


Floating family foto


Hiding in her little cocoon


And finding herself VERY clever for surprising Grandma

We also finally rigged up a tube to the back of the boat to go cruising around the lake. Matt was the first victim and G liked watching him until he (purposefully) fell off. Then she flipped out because she thought Daddy was hurt, which was endearing but seriously took her a little while to get over. I thought the best way to show her it was ok was for us to take a family dip in the middle of the lake. She LOVED it and I can't wait to take her back in next weekend.

Pre-fall. Happiness all over.


Honestly, the water in the middle of the lake is ten times more refreshing than on shore. Not sure how that works but I'm going to go with it


Happy little swimmer!